Matthew 18 Confronting Sin Biblically

Hello world!

   It is February 8th and today's blog will be talking about another biblical topic..and that would be confronting sin biblically. We will be asking questions such as what kind of sin should be confronted? How do I confront others in a way that is not offensive? What if others don't want to be in a relationship with me because I confronted them? These are all very good questions that I intend to answer in this post...lets look into the Scriptures and see what they have to say on the matter.

I. How often should we confront sin?

  Matthew 8:15- "If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.  "But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED.  "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector."   
  Wow...that is a mouthful. What does this passage of scripture tell us as believers? Observing the first part of the verse we see that it tells us, "If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private;" The first thing we see in this verse is the part where it says "If your brother sins"...does this mean anytime someone sins we should say something to them? We as believers know that we are constantly sinning..we sin all the time. We never take a vacation from it and we constantly offend people without even realizing it. So should we ever take a break from confronting others sins...the answer is obviously yes. If a person is always confronting someone to the point where everything a person does gets confronted..the person can't ever get into the habit of repenting by themselves!
  So what should we actually do? Well there are two times we as Christians most definitely should confront our fellow brothers or sisters. The first situation in which we should do so, is when a brother or sister offends us personally on a regular basis. Why should we confront when this happens? Typically when a person offends us it can tend us to make us angry. When it is on a consistent basis we sometimes even get feelings of murder in our hearts over the constant offenses. We as Christians aren't to be angry or resentful but we are to be merciful and gracious. There is never anything wrong with letting a person know that they hurt your feelings..it will happen all the time. To avoid keeping resentment and bitterness in our hearts, the Lord wants us to talk to the person who offended us about it. 
 The other situation in which  this is practical is when you notice a CONTINUAL pattern of sin. A pattern of sin that could destroy a person's relationship with the Lord. This isn't an issue with preference..this is an issue of dishonoring the Lord consistently. Failure to confront people in sin when faced with these scenarios doesn't help the person in sin and it puts us in a situation where we are sinning out of a lack of courage to do what the Lord wants us to do. 

II. Privacy of Confrontation

  "Show him his fault in private"....people who offend us may or may not offend us in public. Sometimes it can be in front of a lot of people and sometimes it may be in a one-on one conversation. If it is in front of a number of people, the scripture clearly instructs us in this verse that we are not supposed to make known the sin in front of others. We are to pull this person aside and talk to him or her privately. It can't be any more clear than that people....

III. When they don't listen?

 Let's face it. Pretty much all of us are really prideful people. When someone confronts us on a personal issue they have with something we've said or done we are not always ready to admit that we are wrong. In fact, a lot of the time, we can perhaps even view the person who is confronting us as being a nag! Let me just say that this is the absolutely WRONG attitude to have as believers. We are not only to listen to what a person confronting us has to say, but we are also to respect the fact that they are coming to us in the first place if their motive is to help us be more holy! I think that there are many times in which someone will say something about our behavior to us and we will deny it rather than taking a step back and examining ourselves! We need to be humble. Humble and willing to change for the glory of Christ. 
 When people don't listen, Matthew 18 gives us instruction,  "But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED.  "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector." We are to do whatever we can to make sure that the relationship between us and the person that has offended us is reconciled in a biblical way. We are to deal privately the entire time until it has reached a point of unrepentent sin. This process is very serious to the Lord even to the point that He commands us to church discipline or "put out" those who are unwilling to repent of transgression. We are to treat this person as a "tax collector".
  Its just yet another reminder that the Lord does not take sin lightly..especially when it comes to the holiness of those in the church body.

IV. How do I confront in a way that doesn't offend? 

   Another thing we have to deal with when it comes to confronting others...not all ends well. As we have already seen, failure to address or repent of continual sin or offenses results in serious consequences! Fact of the matter is, there is usually always a way to say something in the most loving way possible. We need to be kind and Christ-like in our approach. If we are really really eager to confront someone about something then it's probably not a good idea to tell them right away. We need to take a step back examine our heart and tell the person when we feel like our heart motive is right. We should enter every confrontation only seeking the holiness of the person you are talking to. Sadly, some people are very abrasive and might treat you badly for confronting them even if you are coming to them lovingly. I think we as people can be very afraid for this very reason. We don't want our relationships with a person to end because of sin. We even more so truthfully don't want to be labeled as legalistic and we don't want to face hostility. What we often forget as Christians, is that what men think of us doesn't matter. What really matters is that we honor the Lord with our conduct and that we are honest with our brothers and sisters in the Lord about the sin issues we observe. Regardless of how people respond, we need to be faithful to our Lord and confront those who need to be confronted.


That is all for today everyone! I really do hope these blogs are helpful and informative. My biggest desire through all this blog writing is that I (through what I type into my posts) will glorify the Lord greatly and put into my posts only information that will benefit people spiritually. I have grown a lot through these studies and I really hope this is the case when I decide to write on biblical topics :D Bye all! Don't be shy...comment if you have any questions or things that you wanted to add! God Bless!